Monday, October 31, 2005

Artist's Way: Monsters

How appropriate to be writing about monsters on Halloween . . .

I sometimes don’t recognize someone as a monster, as Julia Cameron describes them in TAW, until I'm thinking about the origins of a negative or limiting belief that pops into my awareness. This summer I came face to face with a fear about myself that I’ve carried around for most my adult life and realized that it originated with my ex-husband, someone whom I have identified in the past as a hero for all his support and confidence in me. Despite all the good he did for me, a single, negative parting shot managed to work its way into my subconscious and limit my life choices for more than 20 years. I think this summer’s aha! moment is the biggest reason I jumped at the opportunity to join the Artist’s Way Quilters group. I need to do this work again.

The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities. - Sophocles

I’m not sure I totally agree with Sophocles, quoted today on google, but I do know that a seemingly innocent comment—from a loved one, guild member or, even, posted on an online forum--can insidiously work its magic, slow me down or completely block me from making certain choices and I do believe that the one thing over which I always have control is my attitude toward those subtle monsters and their ideas.

But first, of course, I have to recognize them.

4 comments:

Debra Dixon said...

Yes, just when you think they are gone, they rear their ugly heads to remind you of yourself. Happens to me too.

sophie said...

I think that Cameron uses the imagery of a path, spiraling up and around a mountain. I do think that having previously identified the big bad monsters in my life, I'm now taking another pass at this lesson from a higher elevation and developing an awareness of the more subtle, insideous variety.

Rian said...

Slay those dragons, girl! You are master of your domaine.

sophie said...

Rian, In some ways, I feel like I have slain the DRAGONS long ago, so this time around, I'm trying to be more sensitive to the more subtle negative messages around me. I hope I didn't seem to be making DRAGONS out of dust bunnies.

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